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“A debut of deep compassion and clear-eyed vision.”

—Aimee Bender

Welcome! I’m Vanessa Carlisle.

I am an author, educator, and coach. I see individual clients, facilitate workshops, and create content that catalyzes real change.

I coach individuals and couples/non-nonmonogamous relationship groups who want to tap in to their sexual expression & embodied wisdom to shift from stuck places. I support people facing the challenges of end-of-life and their families/communities/loved ones.

I educate at colleges and universities with Gender, Queer, or Women's studies departments who want nuanced conversations about sex work and the movement for sex workers’ rights; community groups who want trauma-responsive self defense classes; organizations & companies seeking top-notch training in gender inclusivity, consent culture, and LGBTQ issues; writing groups that need more embodiment in their narratives. 

I write both fiction and nonfiction. I research and create conversations on a variety of issues, from sex workers' rights to polyamory, creating healthy boundaries, kinky skills, somatic self support and more. 

My Background: I earned my PhD in Creative Writing, Literature, and Gender Studies from the University of Southern California. I also have a Bachelor's in psychology and a Master of Fine Arts in fiction. I have worked in the sex industries for 22 years. I am a NEDA Proficient death doula, trained by Going with Grace. This work reflects my larger commitment to body-based wisdoms and shame-free connection.

Get in touch! Let's work together.

 

My 2010 novel about a sex educator finding her way in Los Angeles. Order hard copy or ebook here!

My 2010 novel about a sex educator finding her way in Los Angeles. Order hard copy or ebook here!

 
Photo of white femme with shoulder length blonde hair wearing red lipstick and smiling in front of a red curtain.

Listen up! I am now co-hosting “Body Politics: Sex, Love & Liberation” LIVE 1st and 3rd Thursdays at 5PM on KPFK 90.7FM in Los Angeles or at kpfk.org!


 

Workshops, Classes & Coaching

Here are a few examples of my successful programs. All workshops & classes can be tailored to your group,community, or school. My work is always LGBTQIA* inclusive, trauma-informed, sex-positive, body-positive, and grounded in intersectional analysis. I also offer coaching services for small groups, couples, or one-on-one.  


Self protection training

Using the principles of jujitsu, I train participants in a variety of techniques including situational assessment, verbal boundary setting, escapes, and self defense strikes. My self protection classes are designed to empower students with disabilities, sex workers, queer people, women and anyone who is regularly targeted for unwanted aggression.

Tailored to the needs of each group, available for corporate/client-facing environments!


understanding sex work and human trafficking

For college classes, therapist consortiums, social workers, and others interested in how the new movement to end human trafficking is having unintended deleterious effects on vulnerable populations. An introduction to the global sex workers' rights movement, and how allies and people in helping professions here at home can interact more supportively with sex workers and their clients. Available as a guest lecture or a part-time academic appointment that requires semester-length syllabi.


queer studies: theory & writing

For Womens', Gender, & Queer Studies programs at the college level. Can be adapted for writing groups or individual authors. I engage students in the history of the LGBTQIA* movements in the U.S., encourage reflection through reading and writing exercises. Available as a guest lecture or a part-time academic appointment that requires semester-length syllabi. 


One-on-one coaching sessions

For anyone who desires growth, change, transformation, and expansion of their capacity to connect, feel pleasure, and love their life. I offer coaching on Zoom until COVID19 is managed, and use somatic methods that are not always available in traditional therapy. At times, everyone struggles with gender and sexuality. The key is empowerment toward authentic expression. I can help you break through old patterns and align your behavior with your values.  

 

 
 
Our visions begin with our desires.
— Audre Lorde
 
 

 
 

Let's Chat.

Use the form below to contact me with questions about my workshops & classes, one-on-one coaching, and to get on my mailing list. (I send very few emails, and I protect your privacy.) Please be as detailed as possible in your introduction, so that I can respond thoroughly and effectively. I look forward to hearing from you!

 

 
 
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